Norwegian Epic (Updated VI)

Posted: 8 May, 2010 by SeaBart in monster, paintjob, ugly
Tags: , , , , , ,

Norwegian Epic

IMO : 9410569

Build : 2010  by STX Europe Chantiers de l’Atlantique shipyard, Saint-Nazaire in France, nr ??

Update VI (08-05-2010)

I have found some aerial pictures from the here much discussed subject showing you the amount of attraction parkness stuffed on the most upper decks for the entertainment of the trapped people on this over the top cattle transporter cruisevessel

And a new bowshot to compare it to the one below, so you can see the progress of the drama unfolding.

Update V (06-04-2010)

A small update on this nice crispy springday, just to start off your week nicely.

Some pics for the much needed visual stimulation :

on 14-03-2010:

And on 01-04-2010:

According to trustworthy sources one of the engines of this Epic Floating Failure refuses to co-operate and has resigned staging mechanical failure. Oops. This engine will be exchanged during her final drydocking period before handover to the her proud owners. Apparently that handover will take place on the 15th of june, the Transatlantic voyage will start on June 24 and christening is planned to be in New York on July 2.

On another note: Lego (known from the little knobbly blocks) was (maybe a bit too) far ahead of her times when they brought out this Lego set:

Could this have been the inspiration for the designers of the Norwegian Epic?? Or have they been designing using Lego??

(thanks to Dieselduck of which I stole the above)

Update IV (26-02-2010)

While I was gone offshore and not actively watching out for her the owners used the opportunity to sneak her out of the yard for seatrails………

Picture by Bernard Biger, STX France via

Picture by Bernard Biger, STX France via

Picture by Bernard Biger, STX France via

Picture by Bernard Biger, STX France via

But I did notice, a bit later and I’m now warning the world AGAIN :  Watch out for this Epic Ugly Failure of a floating not-so-pleasure village.

Update III (29-12-2009)

Malcolm Oliver of tipped me to these pictures of our most unfavorite cruisevessel.

Picture by Bernard Biger via


Picture by Bernard Biger via

Can the views of a vessel become even more horrendous?? OMFG!! This just shouldn’t be allowed!

Update II (12-07-2009)

Imagine the next line in a crazy high-pitched Frankenstein-like voice:



Update I (08-07-2009)

I think we are going to have a bit of a running post here……expect an update here every time another stage of the build of this Epic Ugly Vessel is completed.

This time the builders seem to have finished the best part of the whole hull & accommodation so you can see for yourself the whole drama of the outlines of this unbelievable hugh floating mistake.

Please hold your heart for the next update…..

Original post

I was already flabbergasted when I saw the renderings of this vessel a few months ago and I was sure to feature it here once she was launched but the comment of Maja gave me the idea to show the renderings here of this future ugly ship. (A first ever: to judge a ship ugly before she’s even launched, only based on the drawings. But even if she’s only half as ugly as shown on the drawings that’s more than enough to justify my premature deed) As Maja said: it looks like they dumped a complete appartment building onto the bridge, just to add a bit more passenger capacity.

They also released a rendering of the socalled artwork which is going to be displayed on the hull: again a swirly mix of pointless thingies, not really artwork if you ask me, my little niece of 3 can do bettter!

She’ll be launched in may 2010 so we got another year before this monster of the seas gets to pollute our views and overload unsuspecting touristy towns with her herds of walking & talking (crawling & complaining??) cargo. Some specs for the anoraks & other interested readers; length: 330 m, beam: 40 m, draught: 8.5 m, amount of passengers: 4200, crew: 1730, speed: 22 knots.

Dunno source, via the Interweb

Dunno source, via the Interweb

Yes, she is Epic….Epic Fail!!

Here are some pics of her under construction… do me & a lot of people  a favour guys, stop building & start scrapping immediately, saves the world a lot of ugliness! There were initially plans for 2 of these monsters but fortunately they canceled the second one.

Thank you Maja…….May God have mercy on us, in Epic portions!


  1. fooman2008 says:

    It looks like someone took an old Oliver Hazard Perry class FFG (guided missile frigate) and grew it on steroids. Perry’s had pretty hulls with a superstructure seemingly without any angles.

  2. bowsprite says:

    Using a three-yr old’s artwork is a capital idea! –and would be much better.

  3. Ken N says:

    There is some pretty ugly cruise ships around, I thought QM2 held the prize until I saw this! This is the mother of them all. Luckily NCL pulled out of the contract to build another 2 of these. Phew!

  4. Ted says:

    get rid of the 4 story welfare aprartment on top of the bridge and this ship is not really that bad….the Jewel class is 10 times better than this ugly beast

  5. Captain Ron says:

    i would never ever go on board of one of these monsters.
    the average drunken passenger can only hope that, in case
    of emergency, if the vessel has to be abandoned, he will
    still find a place in the lifeboats, after eight hours of
    queueing in the stairhouses, and that the vessel has not sunk
    or burnt down to it’s keel, in the meantime.
    experts will now say: it is safe and everything has been tested.
    did they also do a test panic jump from the top deck into the sea ?

  6. Jacob van der Walle says:

    Oh dear…This is DREADFUL!…Does it have to look like this to make money?

  7. Stewart MacKenzie says:

    A ship designed by a left wing committee.

  8. Seven Seas says:

    Damn, who designed this? And who accepted this to be constructed?
    Makes me ashamed to be a Norwegian.

  9. bowsprite says:

    wow! Lego makes it look really good!

  10. David says:


  11. Jacky says:

    Al least they can publish the specs op the lifeboats. 4100 people on board! In a tropical storm, they can use only 10 (off wind side) lifeboats. That means 410 persons in one boat. A quick calculation: Lifeboat length 20 meters, contains 410 people! Difficult.
    205 people in one lifeboat is still very hard!

  12. SeaBart says:

    and adding the factor of the lifeboats actually hanging outboard meaning no protection from the superstructure against wind & waves does make it look like some people forgot about the Titanic disaster.
    I really don’t wanna be found on board of this vessel at sea!

  13. What is everybody’s issue with the way she looks? Norwegian Epic is one of the most innovative ships on the water, bringing the cruise industry so many ‘firsts’ at sea. There is so much to talk about on this ship, yet everybody’s comments come to rest on the way she looks. All ships look pretty much the same on the outside, and from the outside, they all do the same thing – sail on the water! It is what is on the inside that makes ships different, and different the Epic is! Food, style and entertainment are all out of this world, to name but a few things!. Has nobody ever told you people to never judge a book by its cover?!

  14. Connor says:

    They should have called her Epic Fail.

  15. charlie says:

    I live in Miami and when this floating disaster is in port I get angry just seeing her. Damn is she ugly…Why NCL…why?

  16. Sami Ertaga says:

    She is the most uglyest ship I’ve ever seen.

  17. Bo Bowman says:

    I wanted to be a naval architect when I was a young man. I have standards, aesthetics, ideals. Apparently, from the photos, I was lacking the right drugs. This is hideous.

    To “I Love Cruise Holidays,” you are apparently a company hack. Nice try. I spent three years on an aircraft carrier that was better looking than this.

  18. […] is widely regarded as the ugliest cruise ship in existence, as the blog shows in a pictorial. Carnival’s top cruise director, John Heald, wrote on his FaceBook page, […]

  19. Rick Dewies says:

    Seeing as the only cruise ship I have ever been on, were, of the US Navy cruise line, I think it’s a beautiful vessel, and the accommodations surpass the USN cruise line bunking by far.

  20. Candy says:

    Eew god! This Sea Monster is way uglier than Oasis & Allure of the seas and other modern cruise ships! It’s hideous as hell!

  21. Steph says:

    I like the old cruises back in the 70s, 80s & 90s and I even like QM2, Disney Cruises & the new Titanic! they are way better and too nicer looking than this ugly sucker!

  22. Dave says:

    And most everything is a la carte! Ugliest ship ever, usually filled with rednecks or guidos from Miami with gold watches, gold rings and gold necklaces dressed in tank tops!!

  23. Trevor Bradshaw says:

    If you think this ship is ugly then try sleeping in its cabins. I have and they are the worst ones I have ever been in. Beautiful to look at, at first glance, but dreadful to live in. Why? On either side of the door is the toilet and shower. Both have frosted glass walls, which are see through!! There is a curtain to screen off the rest of the cabin but if you are in the toilet or shower when someone knocks on the door, how do you answer it? you are on the door side of the curtain!! To the left just after the shower is the smallest washbasin I have ever seen. Water depth one 1/2 inches .Above is a cupboard which you bang your head on when you bend over the 9 inch bowl. Water goes everywhere and the tap gets in the way of your hands and your face. Water also runs in the cupboards below.
    There is no armchair or table in the cabin, only a stool for sitting on in front of the mirror. This gets in the way when trying to pass the bed which is about 1 foot from the dressing table.If two people are in this part you have to climb over the bed to pass each other.The TV on the wall is opposite the bed and so the only place you can watch it is whilst lying on the bed. further along on the opposite side to the dressing table is a second divan cum sofa with the wardrobes and drawers in front of you. The distance between the two is about 15 inches. A second single bed is in the ceiling. How on earth 4 people could survive for 2 weeks in this rabbit hutch is unbelievable. Oh, and it is nigh on impossible to watch the TV from this pseudo sofa.
    Like most fashion accessories, they look good but are impractical in use!!! NCL wants to sack its staff for allowing this tub to be so badly designed and built.
    My advice is go cruising with RCCL or anyone but NCL!!!

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